Plucked
by starlight.moon.princess
Summary: A night at home with Sean, both of them completely free of duties - that was a rare pleasure. Then Nick opened the door to find Farley Kolt, looking for all the world like a plucked chicken instead of a hawk, and the night just got so much more interesting. :: NickRenard, established pairing


**Waring: Mild crack**

* * *

Nights like these were rare for the two of them. Usually, Nick was out on a case or doing something related to him being a Grimm – often, the two overlapping – and Sean was busy with politics, both the human and the _wesen_ kind. A peaceful night at home was a rarity – a peaceful night with Sean in this condition was a near impossibility.

Somehow, Sean had managed to find enough free time on his hands to have what was perhaps one drink too many. He wasn't falling-down drunk – in fact, Nick doubted he could even _get_ that drunk – but he did have a nice buzz that meant that the filter between his brain and his mouth had expanded enough to let out some of the oddest statements Nick had ever heard from his – boyfriend? Lover? Whatever he was.

"Nick! Can you open the door?" Sean's voice was higher than he had ever heard it, and sounded suspiciously like a whine. He'd have to remember that for tomorrow.

"Of course," he murmured in reply, leaning over to peck him before getting off the couch.

The last person he expected to be standing on the other side of the door was Farley Kolt. He hadn't seen the _steinadler_ in some months, not since the case involving the Coins.

"What are you doing here?" he asked in surprise.

Farley just glared darkly at him before _wogeing_. Nick had to hold in his laughter at the sight in front of him – true composure was an impossibility, but he doubted that the older man would appreciate Nick rolling on the floor, laughing at his expense.

"W- What happened?" he managed to stammer out.

Farley glared some more, this time glaring at him out of yellow-green eyes. Usually, a _steinadler's_ glare was intimidating – but considering the fact that the man looked more like a plucked chicken than a hawk, it was impossible to feel threatened.

"I blame you," he finally grumbled.

Nick stared at Farley for a good few seconds. This time, the man was _definitely_ not making any sort of sense.

"Your boyfriend," he finally said, crumbling under Nick's look of confusion.

"Consort!" Sean yelled from where he was busy lounging on the couch. Nick hadn't even realised that his partner had been listening in to the conversation, or had actually _noticed_ who was at the door. "No wait. He's the consort," Sean continued, sounding faintly confused.

It was getting harder and harder for Nick to hold in his laughter. He was _definitely_ going to be reminding his _consort_, as Sean had called himself, about this in the morning.

"Your _lover_," Farley continued, deciding to take the middle road when it came to naming Sean's relation to Nick, "_Plucked my feathers!_" he exclaimed in outrage.

Nick stared at him. Suddenly, that decision to work for an hour more than Sean for once didn't exactly seem like the smartest one.

"Why don't you come in," he said, moving out of the doorway. He could hear Sean making indistinct noises of protest from inside, but he ignored him. As much as he would have liked a whole night with no interruptions at all, he knew that it was just a fool's dream.

Besides, watching Sean and Fraley try and sort this out would be infinitely more entertaining than listening to whatever new crisis had sprung up in Austria. All he needed now was a beer, a bowl of popcorn, and video camera, and he would have enough blackmail on both men to ensure that he would be living a much more peaceful life for the foreseeable future.

"Sean, I think you two have something you need to discuss."

* * *

**A/N: Another kink meme fic, this one's based on the following** **prompt:**  
_Nick stared at Holt for a good few seconds as the bird wesen stood outside his and Renard's door._  
_"Your Boyfriend"_  
_"Consort!" Renard yelled from the lounge room. "No wait he's the Consort."_  
_"Your lover plucked my feathers."_

**I hope you guys liked this - I had way to much fun with this :P As always, please don't forget to drop a review on your way out :) **


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